Skip to main content

This is a Dress

This is a Dress

Upcycled Dress

Victorian Costume

 This is a dress that was bought in a 1980s, Gunne Sax outlet that was tucked into a rundown strip mall in downtown Montclair, California. A store where the dressing room was one, big open room and my 15-year-old self thought she might die of embarrassment undressing in front of other women.

This is a dress that was worn to one or two of the six formals I went to in high school. On the arm of boys named Tom and Jeff. Boys I dreamed of making a life with one day. Boys I am so glad I didn’t marry. Boys that were kind and handsome and sometimes thoughtless and hurtful. Boys that put up with the same from me.

This is a dress that danced to the music of The Cure and Depeche Mode. In gyms that reeked of sweat, hormones, Obsession perfume, and Polo cologne. A dress that rustled when I walked and felt smooth under the tentative hands of teenage boys as they held me during slow dances. A dress that made my girlfriends squeal in delight, as I did the same for them and their dresses.

This is a dress that put up with my insecurities about my body. This is a size nine dress. A number that I thought, in my youth, was too big. A number I tried to diet away. A number that I thought made me unlovable. A number that sounds incredibly tiny to me now.

This is a dress that my younger sisters borrowed. It carries their memories of dances and boys. Some of the stories I know. Some I don’t.

This is a dress that spent years tucked away in a closet at my parent’s house, surviving moves and a raging forest fire.

This is a dress that was pulled out of storage so my toddler daughter could wear it for dress up.  It turned her into a princess.  It became stained by dirt from the yard and toddler snacks. Its straps were cut and tied to stay up on her tiny shoulders. Its top was folded down, turning into a skirt for an elementary school performance.

This is the dress that, overtime, magically faded from ice blue to soft pink.

This is a dress that has been embroidered to cover stains. It is dress that is still coveted by my daughter, now at the age I was when I bought this dress. A dress she wants to wear to formal dances that she will go to with boys that she thinks she will want to marry but won’t. A dress she wants wear so she can feel like a princess again.

This is a dress. It holds my youth, my sisters’ youth, and my daughter’s. It is so much more than a dress.

__________________________________________________________

*Want to hear the soundtrack for this memoir essay? Here's my This is a Dress Spotify Playlist.

 

Comments

  1. Hi Laura,
    What a wonderful story about your dress. I didn't keep much from my teenage years. I had lots of bell bottoms, peasant dresses and tops. I sewed bands of embroidered ribbons on the bottom of my bell bottoms. I made simple bags and embroidered peace signs and big daisies on them and made "peace" beaded necklaces. But I love this story of yours that really brings those times in full view.

    ReplyDelete
  2. How wonderful that it has lasted long enough to make special memories for an entire family. What could possibly be better?

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. First-THANK YOU! for following me to my new blog. I always appreciate your lovely comments. And yes, I feel very lucky that I saved my dresses. I had no idea I would have daughter who would be wearing them one day.

      Delete
  3. A beautiful post, Laura. I'm amazed you held onto the dress so long and how cool that your daughter loves it now, too. The color change from blue to pink is fascinating.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I wonder what they used to dye the dress originally?

      Delete
  4. Oh, I love everything about this. You write so beautifully I was transported back to the high school gym and the mall and so many other places from long ago.

    ReplyDelete
  5. What a cool legacy that dress has made...I can't think of anything I've hung on to for that long but hopefully all of my quilts that I've made and gifted will have that sort of memory for the recipient! And WOW, from blue to pink...That's kinda crazy in of itself!

    ReplyDelete
  6. What a cool dress! I remember Gunne Sax dresses and thinking they were amazing. I had a couple of dresses from the Jessica McClintock outlet that I loved. I have no clue what happened to them though. It's amazing you held onto that dress for so long! What a history it holds. Ah, the Drakkar Noir, Polo and Obsession. I remember it well.

    ReplyDelete
  7. Laura, you made me cry. Such a beautiful post and legacy piece. I am in awe with your talent and ability to transform it to something that your daughter loves!

    ReplyDelete
  8. Such a beautiful beautiful post. I remember that dress and I remember that girl in the picture. Love you

    ReplyDelete
  9. Hi Laura,
    You do write really well. I think you made a great decision for the start of your new life. This blog is a perfect story. Thank you for sharing part of you and your creative life.
    Asha
    amenghra@hotmail.com

    ReplyDelete
  10. Lovely! So much rings true that I was transported back in time. ❤️

    ReplyDelete

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

The Garden Through the Years-June

This is our sixth year gardening. It's been a journey, every year we learn a little more. The garden has not only taught us how to grow plants, but also how to have patience and hope. It's taught me the healing power of nature. It has helped my husband and I grow our marriage through planning the garden and working side by side. It's inspired me creatively. Every year, I usually share a monthly update of my garden during the summer months. I'll continue the tradition this year, but I am also planning to share the garden's growth over the past six years. I'll show you what it looked like each month over the years. We started our garden in 2017, about 10 months after we moved to the Pacific Northwest.  My husband built our raised beds and we put up temporary fencing around the perimeter to keep the deer out. It was cumbersome to get in and out of the garden and it didn't deter the deer or the bunnies. They found a way in regardless. We grew tomatoes (too many)...

How to Stay Friends without Social Media

How do you stay in touch with people once you leave social media? This one of the main concerns I hear from people when they find out that I’ve quit social media. To be truthful, you will fall out of touch with some people. But you know, that’s not always a bad thing. At least it wasn’t for me. According to anthropologist Robin Dunbar, the number of people humans can sustain relationships with is 150. He based this number (called Dunbar’s Number ) on the size of the human brain. The thesis is that primates are wired to be in group sizes that will assist with survival. While there are arguments about the validity of this theory, I know I feel stressed-out when I have too many relationships going on and not enough time to nurture them.   Being a good wife, mother, daughter, sister, and friend is very important to me. It brings me joy to take care of the people I love. I cook for them, check-in on them regularly, and give them my focused attention when I am with them. But I mus...

The Seed Library

I am standing in front of the old, wooden card catalog of the Washougal Library and am reminded of the card catalogs of my past. The first was in my elementary school library where we learned how to look up books using the Dewey Decimal System. I remember the sound the drawers made as I slowly and carefully pulled them out-a quiet creak of wood in a silent library. Then the smell would fill the air. It was the smell of old paper and the typewriter ink the librarian used to carefully catalog the books.             Now, I look up my books on a computer but today I am, once again, standing in front of the card catalog. I pull out the drawer and am surprised that the sound and the smell are still there, even though I am standing in a library 2,455 miles away from the one in my memory. The drawer no longer holds cards listing a multitude of books to be read, instead it holds small packets of seeds.      ...

Witcherature

  There I was in my family’s half-finished basement, surrounded by my friends. It was the mid-1970s at the end of October, in a small town in Ohio and my mom was throwing me an epic Halloween party. We had just finished a game where we sat in a circle on the old rug that barely protected our bottoms from the cold linoleum basement floor. My mom started telling us a scary story that involved body parts and, as the story went along, she would pass the ‘body parts” around the circle. It was pitch dark in the room and we could only use our hands, not our eyes. Ice cold hands (water that had been frozen in rubber gloves, a heart (peeled tomato), and eyes (peeled grapes) were solemnly passed around. My friends and I were around eight years old at the time, so we tried to laugh off our fear, tried to remind ourselves it wasn’t really body parts that were being passed around, but I think we were all relieved when the story was over, the lights turned on, and cupcakes started getting passed...

Building a Cookbook Library

I collect cookbooks.  I know I could look-up just about any recipe online, but I can't give up my cookbooks. I love sitting down with a stack of cookbooks and planning a holiday meal or dinner party. Sometimes, if I'm feeling bored or anxious, I'll pull a favorite cookbook off the shelf and just read it. I love the photos. I love to daydream about making the dishes. Sometimes they inspire me so much I get up and bake something. To me, cookbooks are so much better than cooking blogs. Is it just me or have they gotten impossible to navigate? First there's the pop-up ads that always seem to crash the website at the very moment I'm rushing to check how long the brownies are supposed to bake. By the time I reload the website, I have burnt bricks of chocolate. I also hate the long, drawn-out stories before I get to the actual recipe. Don't get me wrong. I love a good story behind a recipe. Heck, when I share my recipes, I usually give you a story. What I hate about mo...

Marketing Without Social Media

Can you run a business without social media? This is a tricky topic for me to answer because this last round of quitting social media coincided with me going into a bit of an early retirement (at least from my embroidery and design business), but I can tell you about the first time I took a hiatus from social media and how it affected my business. Simply put, my sales increased threefold while I was off social media. Marketing Without Social Media That is an impressive number, isn’t it? I was surprised. Like anyone else, I bought into the belief that social media was the only way people would find me was through social media but when I sat down and really looked at my numbers, my sales were NOT coming from social media. Pinterest (which I consider a search engine rather than social media) and my newsletter were the biggest referrers to my website. With that knowledge, I decided that I would focus on my newsletter, blog, and a few traditional marketing tactics to grow my business. ...

Hacking My Way Through COVID

  If you are wondering where I’ve been, the answer is locked in away in my master suite, battling Covid-19. That’s right, I am no longer a card-carrying member of the NOVID crowd. Which is a bitter disappointment as I really was starting to think I had some sort of superhuman immunity to it. But, despite vaccines, mask-wearing, and handwashing I caught it. My husband and daughter had colds earlier in January. They tested negative for Covid so when I came down with cold-like symptoms, I assumed I caught their colds. I tested negative but a few days later, as I laid in bed shivering and worse than ever, a small voice said I just might want to test again and sure enough I had it. I texted down to my husband and was promptly locked away, like a princess in a tower. My first thought was that I would spend my isolation writing the next Great American Novel. Or maybe I would use the time to set goals and plan for the new year? But after two days of not being able to focus on anythin...

Books for Writers

I am always looking for ways to become a better writer and the one piece of advice I hear most is to read more! Here’s a list of the books that I think have helped me improve my craft this year. The Way of the Fearless Writer by Beth Kempton This book isn’t being released in the U.S. until the summer, but you can buy a copy on Book Depository now. I love Beth Kempton’s books, and this, her first book on creating a writing life, is one of the most unique books on creativity and writing I’ve read in a long time. Beth is a Japanologist and applies Eastern wisdom to the practice of writing. It’s a unique and gentle way to approach writing. The book is jam-packed with writing prompts that have inspired quite a few essays for me. If you liked Anne Lamott’s Bird by Bird or Natalie Goldberg’s Writing Down the Bones , you’ll love this book. Bonus! Beth has a podcast where she talks about some points from the book and gives writing prompts. She also has a free writing e-course ( Win...

A Year of Food Memoir

  Last year, when I decided to turn my creative attention to writing memoir, I knew I had to read it as well as write it . Looking at my reading journal, it looks like I read over twelve memoirs, each bringing me a different view on not only life, but also how to write one's personal story.  This year, I'm turning my attention to food memoir. If you have spent any time reading my old blog , you know that I love to cook and I've played with the idea of writing a cookbook or a food memoir for a long time so I thought it might be fun to read food memoirs and cookbooks this year to get inspired and learn how authors share their lives through food. Looking at my shelves, I realize that this interest isn't new to me. There's Kitchen Confidential by Anthony Bourdain, who single-handedly ruined going out to eat for me. Isabelle Allende's Aphrodite is one of the most sensual books about food I've ever read. MFK Fischer's description of eating an orange that sa...

A Slow Holiday Season

It is Christmastime at our house. We have pulled our trees and ornaments out of storage just in time for the darkest days of the year. It is an unusually wet season (even by Pacific Northwest standards) and most days it seems the sky is under a large piece of dark gray flannel. The sparkling fairy lights strewn over the mantel and the lights of the tree illuminate the house in a way that lamps cannot. The light fades just as I leave to pick-up my daughter from school. Before I go, I walk through the house, lighting the trees and all the fairy lights. It is a small, festive way to welcome her home from a wet day out in the world. When we get home, I make a simple snack. Apples and peanut butter, cheese and crackers, or, for a special treat, hot cocoa and popcorn. We sometimes turn on the gas fireplace.  We settle under quilts my mother-in-law made and watch Dash and Lily on Netflix . It is our second year watching it. We greedily look at the dreamy holiday interiors.The holiday soun...